Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Randomize
