shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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