I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize
