don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
i think my cat just said my name.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
