Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
