shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
