She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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