Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize