dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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