Can Purell be used as lube?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
