found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
