Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed

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(716): View more from New York

Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.

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(347): View more from New York

just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner

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(519): View more from Ontario

i am way too old to be getting fingered at work

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(312): View more from Illinois

I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".

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(914): View more from New York

He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List

(914): View more from New York

Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)

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(913): View more from Kansas

I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.

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(914): View more from New York

You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.

(914): View more from New York

You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?

(1-914): View more from New York

Yes it does.

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