Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Randomize
