Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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