It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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