I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
The chlamydia really affected his face.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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