please come you make the beer taste better
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
