I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
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