Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
