i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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