She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
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