guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize