My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Text me some of your sweat
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
