i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
