so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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