he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize