Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
