So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
