I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
