I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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