So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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