Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
