im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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