the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
