So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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