I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Randomize
