you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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