I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
