i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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