do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
