Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
