hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
