That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
