I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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