it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I had to cum in my sink.
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