Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
