Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
