He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize