STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
