SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
My ATM looks so different sober.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
