i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
