Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
